Hey there everybody, long time no talk! Can you believe it has been almost a full month since I made the decision to take a brief hiatus from Gamer in a Gown?
It took me less than two months to completely break one of my biggest New Year’s Resolutions to myself. When I started Gamer in a Gown back in November, I told myself that I was going to stay dedicated. I was going to spend my time ensuring that I never missed a Monday blog post and always shared on Instagram every other day at the very least.
But here is the thing, I have totally broken this promise, and you know what? I have never been more proud of myself for doing this.
After some introspection, time to relax and my wedding, I am now back, refreshed and better than ever.
And while I do feel guilty for being MIA, I wanted to share why I chose to temporarily step away from Gamer In A Gown, my new thought process over content creation and why you should never feel ashamed to step away and take a breath when you are feeling overwhelmed.
Why I Stepped Away
There were weeks when I truly felt great. I was constantly inspired, I had blog posts prepared weeks in advance and I felt genuinely proud of what kind of content I was putting out in the world for you to read.
My belief system has always been this – the internet is already so convoluted with websites, blogs, content, and images. And while we are fortunate to have a space where we can all express ourselves freely and openly with limited required resources, I have always felt strongly about ensuring the words that I put out into the World Wide Web were meaningful and worthwhile. To me, Gamer In A Gown would never feature content that was quickly churned out or felt like fillers just for me to be able to say I posted this week.
While every week I did often find myself prepared with content that genuinely made me feel proud, I quickly discovered that you simply can’t always do it all and maintain the quality goal you have set for yourself. For me, these challenges were dealing with balancing the blog on top of big things happening at work and wedding planning. In the blink of an eye, my carefree writing evenings were replaced by late night Keynote preps, phone calls with vendors and seating chart discussions.
A Slave To The Like Button
Of course, I would try writing in my own time. I would remind myself that big bloggers were able to juggle their busy schedules and never missed a post. But amongst all of these stressors, I noticed the blogs that I would begin writing were shorter, less thought out and just…truly didn’t feel like myself. I was just not proud to post the content that I had written over the last month.
On top of this, I found myself completely overwhelmed with the unspoken rules, regulations, and expectations of maintaining social media accounts. Instagram, in particular, has been one that I had been working to grow and I had really begun realizing that this simple platform that was supposed to be fun has overtaken my life. I spent more time stressing about what images to post next, crying over my inability to take a good flatlay shot, and obsessing over why my most recent picture didn’t break 100 likes than I did spending time with Kevin, building relationships and really prioritizing what was important in life. Instagram’s algorithms and engagement rules took over my nights. Kevin’s and my movie nights consisted of him actively watching the film, and myself scrolling through my feed. My thought out captions began to feel lazy and uninspired.
At this point I was no longer living or having fun, I was a slave to the unrealistic expectations the public has created over being a blogger or influencer. And I needed to do something about it.
As I tried to make the decision whether or not to move forward with a break, my mind flashed back to those massive bloggers I had referred to before. Thinking back towards them really concreted my decision to take a breather. As these individuals grew more popular or busier, they didn’t learn to balance, they learned to innovate and do what they needed. They got assistants, they outsourced, they brought in writers, they hired social media specialists to maintain their accounts. They did what they needed to do for their own health and the integrity of their blog.
And in that moment, I knew that for my own health and the integrity of my little, no-name blog, I needed to do what I had to do as well. And that is why I made the decision to take a hiatus to focus on my real life priorities. I also made a choice to stop obsessing over my Instagram scheduling and follower counts. It finally concreted in my mind that these likes and followers are arbitrary numbers that literally do not matter.
Now I am married, back from my honeymoon, back on track at work and ready to approach Gamer In A Gown with newfound respect and appreciation that I was missing before. I love this blog, you all. I love the creativity it gives me, the ability it provides for my voice to be heard and my style to be seen. I love the people it has brought into my life. I love it so much. I truly believe that making my decision to step away for a moment to breathe saved the integrity of this little blog I created. I believe that my readership deserves the best, and I promise to never produce content that feels half-hearted, disingenuine or rushed. I am stating this right here, right now, regardless of if this blog is ever fortunate enough to blow up or if it stays this small forever.
One Final Note
I know that this blog post really focused more on me, but I do hope you can find my mindset applicable to your daily life as well.
If you are in a situation where you are finding yourself overwhelmed, juggling too much or really losing what made you inspired in the first place, do not feel ashamed to step away and take a deep breath, even if it is just for a second. Nobody expects you to do it all, and that should not be a stressor that is placed on your shoulders. As humans, we so easily forget that we are fragile and that sometimes we really need to put ourselves first or ask for help.
You don’t need permission, and you shouldn’t let your life revolve entirely around projects, people, or responsibilities without taking a single moment to address your mental health and wellness. If this sounds like the boat that you are currently in, this is me reminding you that you completely have permission to catch your breath and step away for a minute if you are feeling overwhelmed or losing what makes you feel like yourself.
I truly hope you take this to heart and I wish you nothing but self-love, self-expression, and happiness.
I am so excited to be back, and I can not wait to continue this journey of sharing life, fashion, gaming and everything in between with you moving forward. Thank you again for your patience, understanding, and loyalty during my time away.
Necklace: This gorgeous piece was generously provided to me by Saturday Skyline. Not only is this necklace classy and minimalistic, under
Dress: Nasty Gal – Sold Out; Similar: Similar
Boots: Steve Madden – Sold Out; Similar